Hey, dudes, wassup? Elvis here, coming to you from our ship, which is just about to pass Pluto. Pluto is my favorite planet in your galaxy because it is named after a dog, and I LOVE DOGS!! Some of my favorite Earth beings are dogs. Larry is giving me static because he says Pluto isn’t really a planet, and it’s not named for the dog Pluto. He be all like, “Dog, you all damp!” And I be like, “I don’t care. I like my story better.” In case you are worried about little Getlo, my dog, you can …
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Elvis’s Blog #2
Earth Dudes, Elvis here. I thought I’d better write again right away because so many of you were worried about Saturn’s moons after my last postal. So I’m writing now to tell all of y’all to chill. We would never hit a moon. I was just pushing your legs. Larry says that I couldn’t hit the broad side of a marmaltyxsorumpus, which is a very big animal that lives in the Honn galaxy. It is about the size of a Taco Bell. Maybe y’all are wondering how I’m communicating with you. I fixed our …
Do other dimensions or alternate universes really exist?
On Parallel Universes and Other Cosmic Weirdness by Tom Burns It all began with a cat. Well, no. Not really. I’m not sure whether the cat exists or not, and therein lies the possibility of parallel universes, or parallel dimensions as this and many other science-fiction novels refer to them. In fact, it all begins with quantum uncertainty. Quantum uncertainty is one of the reasons I have been a big fan of science fiction since my misspent youth. I love the way science fiction …
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Why does time pass more slowly in space than on Earth?
On Space, Time, and Spacetime by Tom Burns Jane gets into a spacecraft and travels to a nearby star. From her point of view, she has taken most of her lifetime to get there and back. But when she returns, she finds that all of her relatives are dead and Apple no longer supports her version of the iPhone. What gives? What gives is Einstein’s Special Theory of Relativity, which has the reputation of being difficult to understand. There are good reasons that this is so. Einstein’s …
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CHAPTER THIRTY THREE
I know you’re not waiting for me to tell you whether Earth survived. It’s still here. But as Robbie keeps reminding us, “Time works differently in outer space,” which is his way of saying that we’re not out of the woods yet. I’m not optimistic myself, not about the future of the planet. Even under the threat of global annihilation, people continue to wage war, usually for no better reason than to secure the oil that will probably burn the planet to a cinder long before the extraterrestrial …